Taking it All In

Cipi (far left) is an excellent soccer player, just in love with life. Daniel and Vasile (middle two) I knew from an orphanage before they went to FCI. Vasile always whistles these old Romanian folk tunes while doing chores with me. Andrei (right) cut my hair while I was there.

My dear Kenyan friend, Samuel, always scolds me when I leave the country without explaining what I am doing, so I told him I'd write a bit about what I am doing this trip, and I tagged some of you in my note for various reasons so that you'd at least know what my departure/return dates are. :)

Playing soccer against the village kids--we always win by a long shot.

I leave for Romania on Thursday. I have a lot to get done. A lot. More than I think I can physically accomplish. As my dear brother would say, 'whatev.' I would say that I trust God to help me get through it, but I'm just not sure that's how things work. I mean, it is my trust in God that gets me through each day as I learn to find him in my daily tasks. At the same time, it is I and not God who decided to take on all the things I have taken on. And truthfully, I love living on the edge, and I'll do it for a while yet while I am young and my body can. Getting away from the chaos to visit Romania will be refreshing, though. It gives me time to clear my mind, breathe a little more deeply, see the world from a less superficial perspective.

Friday morning I'll have breakfast with Leslie in the Amsterdam airport. Friday night I'm going to stay with Pastor Nicu and his family--he very nicely is picking me up from the airport so that I can avoid the hassle of busing into the city. Sunday I am going to meet my aunt whom I've never met before.

Fundatia Crestina Ioan (The Christian John Foundation, a two-year boarding/trade school for disadvantaged boys/young men to learn carving and carpentry).

From then on I'll be at the trade school where I normally go, just getting into the lives of the young people and sharing the love of Jesus with them. I do everything they do from morning 'til evening: get up early, do chores, learn to carve, play soccer, do more chores, watch soccer, and do devotionals. I also try to break up the monotony of their routine by taking group outings to the Cofetaria (pastry place), perhaps ice skating if it is cold enough, having hot chocolate parties, getting out the boxing gloves, etc.

Timotei at the vise grip.

Another Andrei--my boxing partner. Quite a bit skinnier than me, but a bit stronger. I think he's going to try to beat me this trip. :)

I show the boys, as their peer, the love and hope of Jesus. They show me what it means to live presently, and to really be alive.

Thursday the 6th I am going to meet my sponsorship child. I'm very excited about that, but I'm not sure that I'll get to take pictures due to unfortunate Romanian laws.

Then I'll be back at the school until the 12th, and I'll come home the 13th to catch up missed days of school and get back into the old grind.

Hot drinks are simply my thing--and hot chocolate/card game parties soon became a popular evening pastime.

So, anyways, I'm very excited to go, and I'm working very hard to get things done and ready to leave. I'd very much appreciate your prayers, not only for me as I go, but especially for all the friends and new people I'm going to connect with along the way.

With love.

Johnny

Theism.Deism.Love

Everyone needs a quiet place to reflect and soak in the good and evil, the ups and downs, the successes and tragedies that constitute the human experience. For me, at the end of long, stressful school+work days, I periodically seek stillness in the quiet of my lime-walled, black-furnished, fake-wood-floored office. I warm my hands with chamomile, my body with the aroma of a cucumber-melon candle, and my soul with rest of simply being.

I try to avoid over-thinking everything, and I am occasionally successful, but sometimes I grow tense from the disconnect between what I believe and what I know. I am often troubled by my own struggle between being a theist, and a deist. How much, how often, and why does God interfere with the natural world—or how is the natural world his intervention? I have a range of thoughts, I try to consider both science and experience, but in all honesty, I would rather just live and explore the concept than form any solid conclusion at 19 years old.

Nonetheless, I do have this one thought: deism does mean that, though I follow the way of love, in this life, I am still subject to the turnings of the natural world, and there is no guarantee that my ventures will not end in utter failure. Now, perhaps I believe in some sort of balance (i.e., God's will may be sovereign, and his followers' lives may be held protected in the sense that his plan will prevail—but again, that's where I throw my hands and surrender to the fact that I simply don't know how God works.) Does this mean that we should balance living in love and living in 'worldly practicality'? I don't think so. What I've been realizing is that I don't love so that. Jesus didn't teach us to love so that. We don't love so that people will 'come to Christ,' or so that we will lead successful lives, or so that we will win in the end, or so that anything. NO! We love because we are obedient to God's ultimate command that we should love [Matthew 22:37-40]. We believe that, because God said so, LOVE is the goal, LOVE is the meaning to be found in life, LOVE is nature of the kingdom of God. [Of course, our definition of love is always too narrow or too wide, but we're always learning, and genuineness begins in hearts of humility and obedience.]

Does love guarantee success? OF COURSE! LOVE IS SUCCESS!